Training4Manhood

A Few Good Men

Guest: David Salas

 

Thomas Watson - “Great men are the mirror by which ordinary men dress themselves.”

Who are the “great men” that you would want to emulate their lives?

“Older men” includes more than just guys who are older in age than you - some guys might be “younger” than you, but they still are doing things that you can learn from!

Theodore Roosevelt - “Comparison is the thief of joy.” But healthy comparison can be an important measuring rod against which you compare your life and progress in specific areas.

In our current culture, boys are encouraged (manipulated) to stay stuck in “adolescence” - not mature, not grow up, not become the MEN that God has designed!

Psalm 144:12 - May our sons in their youth be like plants full grown, our daughters like corner pillars cut for the structure of a palace

David’s #1 - CS Lewis, author, cultural commentator - check out the wide variety of his writings - from kids books like The Chronicles of Narnia, to apologetics like Mere Christianity, to sci fi like his Space Trilogy.

 

J. Budziszewski - The Revenge of Conscience, What We Can’t Not Know

 

Dan’s #1 - William Wilberforce, Member of Parliament, almost single-handedly abolished slavery in England - check out Eric Metaxas’ book Amazing Grace about Wilberforce (and see the movie with the same title) or read Wilberforce’s own words in A Practical View of Christianity.

David’s #2 - Adoniram Judson, Jr., American missionary to India and several other countries. Learn more about Judson by reading To the Golden Shore or find him in the series of Christian Heroes.

Dan’s #2 - Frederick Douglass, former enslaved person, social reformer, author, friend of President Lincoln - read more about Douglass in The Life and Times of Frederick Douglass or read his own words in The Collected Works of Frederick Douglass.

David’s #3 - Winston Churchill, British Prime Minister, orator, writer, artist. To learn more about Churchill, check out Stephen Mansfield’s book Never Give In or watch Gary Oldman win Best Actor Oscar for his portrayal of Churchill in Darkest Hour. David’s recommendation for reading is The Splendid and the Vile by Erik Larson.

Dan’s #3 - John Quincy Adams, sixth President of the United States AND Congressman! The book that I loved about his battle against slavery was Arguing about Slavery by William Lee Miller. Another excellent book is The Remarkable Education of John Quincy Adams by Phyllis Lee Levin. The movie I couldn’t think of during the podcast is Amistad.

Who are your “cloud of witnesses” - the men (and women) who have gone before you and passed the baton along to you - that you seek to emulate? Think about what it means to be a man, look for men who have or are living a life worth emulating, and learn more about them.

Training4Manhood is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization and donations are tax deductible. You can visit our website at Training4Manhood.com to make a donation using PayPal or can donate with a Zelle account to info@training4manhood.com

The Meaning of Marriage Chapters 5-6

Guests: Mike Thornberry and Gabe Boyd

 

Chapter 5 Loving the Stranger

Love CHANGES us - and the commitment (covenant) will carry us through the changes!

 

Keller - to be fully known and fully loved is our greatest desire.

 

Keller - …while your character flaws may have created mild problems for other people, they will create major problems for your spouse and your marriage.

 

Keller - …you must realize that it isn’t ultimately your spouse who is exposing the sinfulness of your heart – it’s marriage itself.

 

Keller - Don’t resist this power that marriage has. Give your spouse the right to talk to you about what is wrong with you.

 

Mike - my spouse is there to help me be a better version of myself - weaknesses are opportunities for growth!

 

Gabe - the opportunity for growth and development in marriage should excite you!

 

Gabe - serving others is the easiest way to kill pride.

 

Chapter 6 Embracing the Other

 

Mike - we’re talking about the “s” word, and that’s not sex, it’s submission.

 

Both Tim and Kathy Keller share in the book how they came into their marriage with very different views of submission and authority. Communication and commitment (covenant) are the keys to working through those differences.

 

Kathy Keller - submission in marriage was a gift I offered, not a duty coerced of me.

 

Gabe - as the husband, my gift back is to lead well.

 

Dan - Christianity elevated women - now they have the choice to submit, from the position of equality - much different than the cultural concept where women were subservient because they were less than men

Finally, Training4Manhood is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization and donations are tax deductible. You can visit our website at Training4Manhood.com to make a donation using PayPal or can donate with a Zelle account to info@training4manhood.com

Qualifications vs Functions of an ”Elder”

Guest: Dave Moore

 

Qualifications for Overseers from 1 Timothy 3:2-7

Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. He must manage his household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God’s church? He must not be a recent convert, or he may become puffed up with conceit and fall into the condemnation of the devil. Moreover, he must be well thought of by outsiders, so that he may not fall into disgrace, into a snare of the devil.

 

Dave - how do we really measure if a man is “hospitable”?

 

Moore Engaging - Dave’s website for his Two Cities Ministry along with his wife Doreen.

 

Functions of an Elder:

• Acts 6 - an elder should give himself to prayer and the word of God

• 1 Peter 5 - and people who prove themselves to be an example (people want to emulate them)

 

How do you develop (and deepen) your prayer life? “Palpable desperation.” Do you need God to do something or can you manage life on your own? Are you putting yourself in a ministry position where you need God to help you? Dave’s “magic wand” - everyone has to either teach the Word of God or share their faith - then watch their prayer life increase!

 

Check out this video of Dave Moore: https://vimeo.com/754521773

 

Dave - a good diagnostic (test, evaluation) is actually learning to answer questions that other people have - are you equipped, are you doing the work necessary to be able to engage others in a meaningful discussion about the faith?

 

Dave - all good discipleship is usually undoing some bad discipleship.

 

Aspiring to the office of an elder is a noble thing! If you’re not looking to mature in your walk, grow in the grace and mercy of God, then what are you doing?!

 

Finally, Training4Manhood is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization and donations are tax deductible. You can visit our website at Training4Manhood.com to make a donation using PayPal or can donate with a Zelle account to info@training4manhood.com

 

The Meaning of Marriage Chapters 3-4

Guests: Mike Thornberry and Gabe Boyd

 

Chapter 3 The Essence of Marriage is grounded in Ephesians 5:31 (and Genesis 2:24)

For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and be united to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh.

 

Chapter 4 The Mission of Marriage is grounded in Ephesians 5:25-27

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

 

Gabe - the Word of God helps us understand what marriage is as God has designed as opposed to what the world thinks marriage should be.

 

Dan - marriage, from a Biblical standpoint, is the idea that anyone you’re having sex with is a person you are “uniting” and becoming one flesh - God has provided a place for that physical and sexual connection - within the bounds of marriage.

 

Mike - “covenant” is the promise of future love - this means that covenant love lasts regardless of emotion - it rides on intention, it is an act of the will. A “covenant” marriage is not about my happiness and it doesn’t survive (or thrive) because of how the other person acts, but how you choose to serve them!

 

Mike - the anchor of our marriage should be our identity in Christ - everything else rocks with the waves!

 

Gabe - when you’re a “consumer” of something, it’s difficult (impossible) to actually figure out how to “satisfy” or “please” another person - or even be satisfied or happy yourself.

 

Mike - everything is marketed to your individual benefit as a consumer, even marriage.

 

Gabe - within the idea of “covenant” there is a protection so that you can truly be vulnerable and fully “known.”

Dan - if you have a problem in your marriage, start praying for your spouse.

 

Mike - show me a husband and a wife who are praying together, they aren’t getting a divorce.

 

Dan - the essence of marriage is a profound and significant friendship!

 

Dan - can you be “unequally yoked” - meaning, can you connect your life with another person who does not have Christ at the center of their life…if Christ is at the center of yours?

 

Gabe - what is friendship in general - great place to start when you think about the idea and concept of marriage.

 

Mike - I am my wife’s CEO - Chief Encouragement Officer!!!

 

Keller - marriage has the power to set your life as a whole.

 

Keller - no other human being should get more of your love, energy, industry and commitment than your spouse.

Finally, Training4Manhood is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization and donations are tax deductible. You can visit our website at Training4Manhood.com to make a donation using PayPal or can donate with a Zelle account to info@training4manhood.com

 

Situational Awareness from the Life of Saul

Guest: Ben Rogers, 5 years Army paratrooper, 2X deployed to Afghanistan, 9 years law enforcement and SWAT team member.

1 Samuel 9 - the story of Saul and his father’s servant looking for the lost donkeys. Read it to get the emphasis behind the podcast!

“Situational awareness” is being aware of what is happening around you in terms of where you are, where you are supposed to be, and whether anyone or anything around you is a threat to your health and safety.

Military training keeps you “on edge” all the time - to help “heighten” your senses, to give you an awareness of things other than your own personal care and comfort!

T4M - developing “situational awareness” means that you see yourself as PART of the world, not the CENTER of it! Which means that you have a role to play - and choices to make - will you be a person who is looking to BE SERVED…or to SERVE OTHERS?

Ben - “situational awareness” means that you need to pay attention to all the facets of your life - your family, finances, freedom…you can’t just bury your head in your mobile phone and not pay attention to the world around you.

Situational awareness can be taught - it’s the self-discipline to not be self-absorbed.

Steps to Develop Situational Awareness:

1. Begins with self-discipline
2. Next step is self-awareness (can’t grow until you’re honest with where you are). 
3. Learn to make goals…and then accomplish them. Start small…but start.

Great resource: Make Your Bed: Little Things That Can Change Your Life…and Maybe the World by Admiral William H. McRaven

 

How to develop a “team” mentality:

1. Consider how your performance is evaluated by those around you…at work, at home, at school, etc…
2. Your family is your first team - you need to prepare to lead your family well.
3. Team “leader” is ultimately responsible - you need to train your children and those under your authority, but the “buck stops” with you as the leader!
4. Develop a mindset that you can accomplish things with or without recognition or praise.

Physical fitness is a great place to start the journey to self-discipline. Exercise, eat right, pay attention to the small details. As the famous Chinese proverb says, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”

Ben - people who read are the smartest people in the world - you’ve got to do it. Best thing to read to start your day - God’s Word!

Ben - apply “situational awareness” and pay attention to your marriage relationship! 

Ben - “complacency kills.” If you DON’T pay attention to these issues, there will be consequences for your lack of awareness.

 

Finally, Training4Manhood is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization and donations are tax deductible. You can visit our website at Training4Manhood.com to make a donation using PayPal or can donate with a Zelle account to info@training4manhood.com

The Meaning of Marriage Chapters 1-2

Guests: Mike Thornberry and Gabe Boyd

 

Tim Keller begins the book by talking about the importance of marriage from God’s design in comparison to what the world thinks about the institution of marriage. He shares some powerful statistics about the decline of marriage in America and then shares a very powerful comment from comedian Chris Rock who said, “Do you want to be single and lonely or married and bored?” The institution of marriage has fully morphed into something that is solely for my personal pleasure - and Keller believes that is not God’s design or intent for marriage!

 

Chapter 1 - “A man shall leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery…” Ephesians 5:31-32

 

T4M is all about the idea that being a man is about being Christ-centered and other-focused, not self-absorbed. 

 

Gabe: marriage has to be seen through the lens of the Gospel.

 

Dan: marriage, like the Gospel, is life-transforming and makes us better people.

 

Mike: when I first got married, I didn’t have a good definition of love. “Love is the commitment of my will to the betterment of your needs regardless of the cost to me.” From Tim Kimmel, Grace Filled Marriage.

 

Gabe: you can only give what you’ve been given. You have to have a relationship with Christ to truly understand God’s design for marriage.

 

Keller: Marriage used to be a public institution for the common good, and now it is a private arrangement for the satisfaction of the individuals. Marriage used to be about us, but now it is about me.

 

Dan: Marriage, as an institution the way that God has designed it, doesn’t make sense without the foundation of a life that has been transformed by the love and grace of Jesus Christ. Do you have to truly understand God’s design for marriage to get married - no, but you won’t be able to enjoy God’s design for sex unless you experience it in it’s proper place within the boundary and protection of marriage. It’s like fire - in the fireplace, it’s great; outside the fireplace, it’s destructive.

 

Chapter 2 - “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” Ephesians 5:21

 

Mike: I wasn’t trying to help my spouse for a long time, I was trying to “fix” her. Big difference.

 

Dan: God loved us while we were yet sinners, and the walk of obedience changes us into the image of Christ. Marriage, when done God’s way, helps change us into the men and women that God desires.

 

Gabe: Keller writes, “Seek to serve one another rather than to be happy and you will find a new and deeper happiness.” This may sound ridiculous - but it’s true. The end result of marriage is that we would love each other for the glory of God, not our own selfish desires.

Finally, Training4Manhood is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization and donations are tax deductible. You can visit our website at Training4Manhood.com to make a donation using PayPal or can donate with a Zelle account to info@training4manhood.com

Election Prep 101 (3 of 3)

Guest: Scott Turner

 

Begin to develop a life of SERVICE  - look for opportunities to plug in and serve your community and your church. Pray that God would help you see the needs where you can serve - there is no “small” opportunity - Scott’s example of reading to younger children in the schools is such an important opportunity that men need to consider and fill!

 

Where does “service” begin - in the HOME! Before you export the wisdom of your life into the world, make sure that you’re actually living it out in your own home.

 

To learn more about “opportunity zones,” check out this resource - Dr. Ben Carson and Scott Turner, former Director of the White House Opportunity Zone and Revitalization Council, discuss the impact and future of Opportunity Zones with a panel of industry experts.

 

Wisdom from Scott:

1. Remember the sacrifices made by those who have gone before - to secure the freedoms that we have today!
2. Vote - remember that you are a Christian and find candidates whose values align with your Biblical worldview - educate yourself. Don’t vote for people because they have the most signs and commercials - find qualified candidates who will put into practice those principles and values that you believe are best for our community and country.
3. Vote - know about the election you’re voting in - who the candidates are, what the issues are, the difference between a primary and general election.
4. Men, you’re called to lead your family and community - voting in one of those important actions you need to engage in.
5. Make voting a priority. Put it on your calendar and go!

Remember to get The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God by Tim Keller - we will begin our books discussions to be released on the Fridays in October!

 

Finally, Training4Manhood is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization and donations are tax deductible. You can visit our website at Training4Manhood.com to make a donation using PayPal or can donate with a Zelle account to info@training4manhood.com

Election Prep 101 (2 of 3)

Guest: The Honorable Mike Johnson, Congressman for the 4th District of Louisiana

Seven Core Principles of Conservatism

• Individual Freedom

1. 1. 1. Individual liberties should be protected against the imposition of government intrusion - life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness
      2. Purpose of Government is to secure our God-given rights

• Limited Government

1. 1. 1. When government expands, liberty contracts
      2. Legitimate government exists only by the consent of the governed
      3. The Constitution provides important safeguards - separation of powers, federalism, etc..
      4. Best protection against government largesse - involved and informed electorate

• Rule of Law

1. 1. 1. No king above the law, everyone subject to the law
      2. Law must be implied partially and fairly to everyone
      3. Each branch of government must perform their function, but not overstep its boundary

• Peace through Strength

1. 1. 1. Provide for the common defense - citizens, property, interests abroad…part of the Preamble of the Constitution
      2. Must remain the strongest power
      3. National security includes border security

• Fiscal Responsibility

1. 1. 1. Most significant threat to national security - our national debt

• Free Markets

1. 1. 1. Allows for innovation and expansion - gives people the liberty to take risks and pursue their dreams
      2. Competition should be encouraged
      3. People and the private sector outperform government every time

• Human Dignity

1. 1. Everyone created in the image of God and has intrinsic value
   2. People should be measured by the content of their character
   3. Hard work should be the pathway out of public assistance
   4. Protect the life of the unborn - from womb to tomb

Check out more with Mike and Kelly Johnson on their podcast Truth Be Told.

Remember to get The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God by Tim Keller - we will begin our books discussions to be released on the Fridays in October!

 

Finally, Training4Manhood is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization and donations are tax deductible. You can visit our website at Training4Manhood.com to make a donation using PayPal or can donate with a Zelle account to info@training4manhood.com

 

Election Prep 101(1 of 3)

Guest: Rick Green

The Honorable Rick Green is a former Texas State Representative, a lawyer, and a successful entrepreneur who has built several businesses from the ground up. His goal is to help Americans to become salt and light in every area of life and to understand America’s Godly history and foundation. He currently travels the nation speaking for WallBuilders, teaching on the U.S. Constitution, and founded the Torch of Freedom Foundation and Patriot Academy. He resides in Dripping Springs, TX with his wife, Kara, and their entire family.

 

Check out more information about Rick Green and his ministry to train people to understand and engage in our political process through the Patriot Academy.

 

Do you want to live in freedom or tyranny?

 

“Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom, must, like men, undergo the fatigues of supporting it.”

Thomas Paine, The Crisis, Sept. 12, 1777

“Perhaps you and I have lived too long with this miracle to properly be appreciative. Freedom is a fragile thing and it's never more than one generation away from extinction. It is not ours by way of inheritance; it must be fought for and defended constantly by each generation, for it comes only once to a people.  And those in world history who have known freedom and then lost it have never known it again.”

Ronald Reagan, Then-Governor of California, Inaugural Address, January 5, 1967

Socialism - the “means of production” is controlled by the government - who decides what you’ll do, who you’ll work for, what freedoms and opportunities you’ll have - those are the questions that clearly differentiate a “democracy” or “free market economy” from one that is socialist.

 

The Law by Frederic Bastiat - want to know why socialism won’t work and is actually harmful to everyone involved - read this!

 

If there is a problem in society, whose responsibility is it to remedy the situation? Is it the responsibility of the individual, the family, the church, or the government? There are different roles and responsibilities for each - but once a task has been absorbed by the government, it’s difficult to shift those responsibilities and activities back to either the individual/family or the church.

 

How to get engaged:

• Take a Constitution course.

• Understand the “political party” system. The “primary” election is the opportunity to select which food will be on the tables. The “general” election is selecting from the food that is already on the table. Also, understand how the political party system affects legislation - the party that has the majority within a given legislature has the power to assign committees and bills to particular committees - a very significant power.

• Do the best you can with what you have where you are. Understand this principle when you go vote - there isn’t a perfect candidate, but you need to select from the “best” of the choices available…and party DOES matter when you vote. For more information, check out Ivoterguide.com

• Make a financial contribution to a candidate of your choice!

Electoral College - think of the World Series. A team (candidate) has to win a majority of the games - it’s not a contest to see who scores the most runs!

Being an educated and engaged citizen is a commandment, a duty, a responsibility - as a citizen of the United States of America, being an educated voter is the first step to being an educated and engaged citizen!

Training4Manhood Giving Opportunity - Zelle account: info@training4manhood.com

Wisdom in the Workplace Episode 3 of 3

Guests: Tyler Reeves, Ty Robinson, and Will May

Where to start? Start every day in the Word - connecting with God before you have to interact with others! It’s amazing how much conflict arises over things that don’t really matter - “personal preferences that replace professional priorities.”

 

You can learn so much more from people who are not like you! Sometimes the “challenges” are simply “differences.”

 

WHEN you encounter conflict - not if, but when. Great place to begin is with YOU. What have you done…and what can you do - instead of looking at the failings and flaws of others!

 

Are you giving energy or taking? Are you making the situation/environment better or worse? Be honest with yourself!

 

When you make a mistake or do something wrong, apologize.

 

Resource Recommendations:

Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success at Work and in Life One Conversation at a Time by Susan Scott

Radical Candor: How to Get What You Want by Saying What You Mean by Kim Scott

 

If you have an issue, go talk to the person face-to-face. Email is not the best avenue to remedy a problem.

 

Are you an advocate or ally for your coworkers? Be a force for positivity in your workplace!

 

Celebrate in public and criticize in private.

 

Run to where God is pulling you…instead of running away from something that bothers you. Good rule of thumb for life, work, ministry, etc.

Training4Manhood Giving Opportunity - Zelle account: info@training4manhood.com